They have to stop thinking in individual terms and start feeling in rapport terms.
A matching is a mapping from the elements of one set to the elements of the other set.
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They pay ridiculous amounts of attention to things like looks, which have little bearing on whether a relationship will work. When online daters actually meet, an entirely different mind-set has to kick in.
If they’re going to be open to a real relationship, they have to stop asking where this person rates in comparison to others and start asking, can we lower the boundaries between self and self.